Yes, I DO have a lot of Babies. Thanks for Noticing.
Words cannot describe the respect I have for Emily over at This if the First Day of My Life. I mean, seriously. Three kids. In 13 months. Who does that?
Not only does she do it, but she rocks it. She totally, totally rocks it. And, get this. This gal isn’t even talking about tying up her ute and calling it a day. She is a breed of mommy I have never met in real life and she does not hesitate to talk about more babies.
Three babies in 13 months is reason enough for me to not only follow her, but heed her every warning and soak in all her wisdom when it comes to toddlers and infants. Because, lets be honest, when your kids are six years apart, it’s like starting over…from scratch.
When you get a moment make sure you follow @emmie_bee and stop by her blog and see pictures of those beautiful babies. All three of them…
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My Nonnie had 6. My grandma? 4. My mom & her sister are 13 months apart. My dad & his brother? 11 months.
And in the 50′s, big families were the norm so I’m sure no one questioned the rapid fire births taking place in the childhood homes of my parents.
Fast forward 50 years, and it’s entirely different. I get the feeling that people JUDGE me for having so many kids in such a little time. Don’t get me wrong. When I found out I was pregnant again, I did have the urge to hide. I wasn’t even sure about ANY kids let alone two so quickly. But, once the shock wave washed over me- I realized how amazing it was. How lucky we were. So, I sucked it up & started mentally preparing for my second child.
When I went for my first ultrasound, I had already been losing weight from the all. day. sickness. but nothing could have ever prepared me for “There’s two. You are having twins.” *Nuclear mind bomb explodes* WHHHHHHHHATTTTTTTTTT!?!?!?!?!?! Yes, with my 6 month old baby in his stroller next my husband & I, we learned I was 2 months pregnant- with freaking TWINS. The doctor told me they were fraternal. It has something to do with the membranes between them that allow the doctor to know that kind of stuff so soon in the pregnancy. My mind was racing. I had MUCH to Google.
And google I did. I learned that fraternal twins are made from two separate fertilized eggs. They are basically siblings who are born at the same time. They share no more genetic make-up with each other than they do with Hudson. It’s possible for fraternal twins to have TWO DIFFERENT FATHERS. I learned that fraternal twins can run in families, while identical twins are an anomaly and happen at complete random. I learned you can only inherit the “twin gene” from your mother & a daughter who is a twin is more than 50% likely to have twins herself. I also quickly learned that the public is totally enamored with twins. I never realized how much until I was carrying them. Even my blog traffic took a major trend upward when I found out. And I get it. Twins are weird. Even though they are pretty common- for the story to play out as it did is pretty unreal. About 1 in 1000 live births are twins. And that is taking into account women who have IVF, where the multiple rate is much higher. But, you know, for little ol’ Emily with the 6 month old & no family history of twins EVER? Yeah, it was a straight up miracle.
And now that they have arrived? Well, let’s just say that the attention paid to twins is pretty crazy. We can’t go to Safeway or Target or anywhere basically without having to chat with pretty much anyone with a uterus about the twins & answer inane questions like ‘are they twins?’ or ‘are they identical?’ (ummmm one has a penis & the other doesn’t.) In our case it gets even better, because we have the added bonus of an adorable 15 month old who flirts like its going out of style. So, basically every public family outing goes a little something like this:
Old lady: “ohhhh my! How old is he? Those eyelashes! What an adorable little man!”
(Hudson bats eyelashes and smiles and covers his face like a total flirt)
Me: “Thank you. He’s 15 months & quite the flirt.”
*just then- Scott will approach with the double stroller*
To which the old lady will exclaim: “ARE THESE YOURS TOO?!”
Me: “Yes.”
Old lady: “ARE THEY TWINNNNNNNNNNNSSS?!”
Me: *insert fake laugh* “yes, they are.”
Old lady: “You must REALLLLLLY have your hands full.”
It’s the go-to statement for every. single. person. we encounter. The checker at Safeway. The lady at Target. The neighbors. “You really have your hands full.” They see all the kids & basically panic FOR us.
And to answer that question/statement: We do. We literally have our hands full. At lunch & dinner it’s the hardest. Everyone needs something at once and it can be crazy. Sometimes the babies have to cry while I attend to something else. But not in an overwhelming way. There is more laundry. Many more cloth diapers. Soon, more baby food to make. Sometimes I can’t shower before 10 PM or brush my teeth or hair. I literally have my hands full most of the time. But, I also have three perfectly adorable children filling them. There is more smiles. More love. More happiness. Everything about being a mom of three that I feared I was wrong about. Being a mom of three babies (yes, Hudson is still my baby) is 90% easy & 100% fun. Two hours a day, I am challenged & near my threshold for screaming. 22 hours a day, I am playing with my kids or holding them & just spending time being my husband’s wife & my children’s mom. I get breaks. My husband is an AMAZING father & almost always does his share. My mom & step dad come for dinner once a week to help. My step mom cooks us dinner on Thursdays. My sister-in-laws are over all the time to hold a baby. My friends come to help. Even Scott’s friends love holding babies. I have great support from my bloggy friends when I feel like the people around me don’t understand.
Maybe my incredible support system has made it easy. I don’t really know. But, so far the only thing being a mom to three has made me -is feel like I want more. My hands will never be too full. Every time I think about how Hudson, Truman & Sawyer were created in 13 short months of the 13 years of love between Scott & I- I am just in awe.
We will never tire of the comments in the grocery store or at the park. Even if they are sometimes annoying. Because we are proving on the daily that it can be done. And it can be done well.
23 comments
Em, this is beautiful and hilarious. I love that you love your life even when you’re overwhelmed.
I’m starting to get some of those judgmental comments and looks too – and mine aren’t even going to be crazy close (20 months). It’s like having one baby is cute and hip and special but having a bunch is something tacky poor people do. Thanks for breaking the stereotype so well!
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I think your family is wonderful. But I would probably be one of those people compeletely in awe of you in a grocery store. But in a good way, because you get to be surrounded by both chaos and cuteness and copious amounts of love on a daily basis!
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Emily, I gotta hand it to you, you are amazing. I love how much you love being a parent. Thanks so much for sharing this story.
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This was very uplifting, Emily. It’s great to reminded of all of the joys of parenthood, even on the difficult days. I love your perspective!
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I get it – twins are weird.
I think I just fell in love. Now I have to go find your blog.
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I love twins and I love the reactions people have to twins. I have 3 sets of twin cousins and twin nieces. I really want twins which everyone says I am crazy but I have always been surrounded by them and I LOVE the bond that they have with each other. I am very close to 2 sets of my twin cousins and love my nieces to death. I think you are an incredible mom and love your outlook on life.
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LOVE this post Em! FABULOUS! Seriously you rock, I used to be terrified of getting knocked up again with Nolan so young…but you make it so easy I almost WANT to haha! (Almost! School first Jessica, SCHOOL FIRST).
xoxox
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You are amazing. This post is amazing. You do it all and make it look good, and I for one am left in awe.
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[...] AM First order of biz: I have a guest post that went up today over at Tiffany’s fabulous blog MOM-NOM.com!! Please go check it out, leave some love etc. I always get really worried when I do guest posts that [...]
I think you should change shit up when “they” ask if tru&soy are twinsies. Like, “no they arent, they shared the womb at the same time but they are just brother and sister.” I would appreciate an answer like that, it would leave me somewhat perplexed and I’d probably go home and start googling.
Everyone I know is amazed by you Em. Seriously. MY FRIENDS and family ask about you often, and are even more surprised when I tell them that you are actually doing really well and haven’t lost your shit yet. When I have bad parenting days I think of you, if you can keep it together than I sure as shit better be able to.
Love ya Mama!
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great post, lady! it’s funny to hear what people say to you in public – i feel like every time i see twins it’s exciting and i’m always more prone to comment & gush! although i know enough about how genetics work not to wonder if a boy/girl combo are identical… :-/ people are silly! they are probably just overwhelmed by the sheer cuteness of your wonderful babies and they get all dumb as a result!
you are a very dynamic, wonderful, special girl, so it’s really no wonder that you ended up with a unique and special family! your kids are so lucky to have you as their mama – and yes i agree, hudson is still a baby. sure he walks and talks a bit, but he’s your baby boy, for sure.
love you, woman! xoxo.
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You my darling Emmie, are an inspiration! I have days with just Everly that I feel like I cannot do it, and I think about you. You handle this all so well, I envy your strength and patience.
I can’t wait till #4
Love you!
(PS – Everly is still holding out to marry those eyelashes of Hudson, so tell him to tone down the flirting ha!)
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Perfect Brandee. That way, when WW3 breaks out he can marry her & escape the draft by moving to Canada.
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I think you rock for being such an awesome, loving mom and not caring so much what people around you think for having so many little ones so close. Like you’ve said many times, not like it was planned!
And you’re so right about how society’s views have changed since the 1950s and 60s. It’s interesting. When I tell people at work we’re thinking of starting our “try” in a few months, they all ask me why? It annoys me to no end!I admire how well you handle everything.
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I have four sons, and if I heard “You really have your hands full” once, I heard it a thousand times — in a week. Mine are all three years apart, but four boys is quite a crowd and since they’re all redheaded, they attract a bit of attention. It seems people lose track if you have three or more — they automatically assume you have eight kids!
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I am a twin and I can definitley confirm that we are a strange breed. I remember my mom telling me how she HATED the attention that toting us around in public would bring. She said it took foreverrr to do simple things. However, my grandmother absolutely loved all the attention. I loved reading this post. I read your blog regularly so it didn’t suprise me at all that I enjoyed it once again.
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So cute! i am so fascinated with twins. I always get the ‘wow you have your hands full’ comments too – ive got 3 (14mo apart/2yr apart).
Thanks for the fun read
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You are awesome! I cloth diaper and make my ONE son’s food. It’s exhausting, but so fulfilling. I can’t imagine doing it for 3. I’m a new follower on twitter.
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I could read the story about Hudson, Tru and Soy over and over again! I really admire you for being such an amazing mom of three babies. It is good to know what “having your hands full” really means. Thanks for sharing
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Well, my two are 13 months apart, and if I saw you in the grocery store, I promise, I would never say “You have your hands full!” because I have heard it oh.so.many.times!
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so beautiful and so strong. very impressive, whether or not you want to hear it.
i’m so very glad for you.
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Hudson is going to get ALL the ladies when he’s older.
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[...] are a bunch of pretty great posts up over there right now by some of my pretty great folks, like THIS AMAZING POST from Emily (emmiebee.com) on having three babies in thirteen months (I'll let you do the math,) or [...]
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